Real people don’t have a gender…nor an agenda

I wonder if gender will ever be simply not seen. I read a post recently that had me walking down memory lane.

I was sun loving tyke with tousled hair, as a child I wondered at the world, loved it just as I do now. My mom had a gem stone licence so we often would head out to outcrops of amethysts, tourmalines and other treasures. I recall a time when we all climbed (my two brothers and sister) into the back of my dad’s Ford truck, with its modified canopy so that we could travel far into the desert to just look. And look we did. I wandered off with my keen eyes and spotted a treasure… but stood dead still knowing that this treasure was not something that others would take too kindly to. A little horned viper, magnificent, the same colour as stone going about its way. I stood dead still, and the Divine Being slithered over my feet, no less bothered than I was. We were simply two sentient beings crossing one another’s paths, with a great respect and awe from me I might add.

I lived out my life as Tassy, the curly haired child that saw ghosts, auras and knew peoples intentions before they opened their mouth. I had no sense of gender. Knew I was labelled as girl – hated dresses, loved cars, played cowboys and crooks. I even had a hero. Terence Hill. My friend Louise Wells and I would enact out scenes from these movies. It as such a free time. We were, I was. Things changed for me when I was about 8, a new awareness arrived. I was being me, when my mother (bless her, I love her) in a fury asked me when I was going to be like other girls? What? What did that mean? I had no absolute sense of others, who they were gender wise. People were just people, yes there are girls and boys, but the division of sexes was not something that existed in my sphere.  

And so began my road of awareness of being different. My first crush on a friend, feeling sexually attracted and knowing that this was not something that could be admitted to. It took another 23 years from age eight when I first fell in love with a woman. Reading Hanne Blanks post (show below) had me revisiting the long road to wishing that people would just be seen as people. Not genders, just people who love people regardless of their sexual assignment, wishing there was a world that we were not fed how we should be… Read it, and see what this evokes within you…

Read her post here: http://www.hanneblank.com/blog/2011/06/23/real-women/

Yeshua, in rags, gave alms to the animals…

Mary Oliver’s lines, shown below have sat with me in another way this month…

“Instructions for living a life. 
Pay attention. 
Be astonished. 
Tell about it.” 

I have been living in a place that I find odd for me. Walls all around, sound of the City, and just a peek of nature, the towering Mother Mountains edges. I KNOW that living in a wild place feeds me the best that this Home has to offer. I wondered how I would live my stillness into this space. I had to conjure the knowledge that Obs is no different from Kommetjie. She is One with the all that exists in all the magnificence. It has been easy to see that…

And in that I saw light beings walking the pavements. Those huddled in the corner, years of drinking and poverty clothing their shiny cloaks. And evidence in the form of a man that stood beside me in a bottle store. I think that he must have the entire store in his body, unwashed and spending what he had on pro longing what I judged to be oblivion. And there, he took his last few cents and put them into an animal welfare tin, muttering “This is for you”. I turned to him and thanked him for making me see this tin, and for prompting me to add to it. Our faces lit up, both us seeing each other in a brief instant of recognition of who we are, WE ARE.

Yeshua, in rags, gave alms to the animals. And I will never forget meeting him…

The Void, though dark is the most fertile place…

The Void, though dark is the most fertile place…

There lies a patterning to this Verse we live in and upon. Wherever my eyes stray there is something that repeats somewhere else, from beach to forest my eyes search and see the similarities in all. This is no less different in experiences, all that has happened has happened somewhere before. I really have a sense that nothing new is really unfolding – bar – the understanding of thoughts and how they affect us – on a mass scale.

Earlier this year I was presented with the most profound gift ever received, yet at the time unwanted.

A Void – in places that really touched raw nerves considering the consumer era we live in. For a period of a month and a half I simply had no income. Zero. I had DONE all that is possible. Everything felt at zero. There was a big nought that I SAW. What I saw came from a space that is so judging, so hooked into the way the world works. But having no choice other than to just be, this is what I did. I sat, beneath a Milkwood, and began to imagineer my life. I sat and listened to what I really want to do, sat and listened to what I am really good at doing, sat and listened to what my heart wanted with this.

I began to see with new eyes what I actually had… and these are lasting things that are not anywhere attached to the way our world works. So in my sitting, I spoke out loud to all that could hear. Sat on rocks at the beach and spoke what I wished, and simply FELT what I wanted. My Beloved recently put it so well, she said that we are really Architects for our lives. What does this Being do really? She designs, puts the pillars in place where they are needed, creates a picture of what the home should look like and once she is satisfied – there are others that take care of the actual appearance of this plan.

Only post the fact do I see how important it is to be clear with what you want, my wording was precise. And my heart too was clear, I was not without fear, facing something like this was not easy…yet here I am… all that I spoke, all that I envisioned is here now and I know that so much more is arriving.

Nature abhors a vacuum, it will fill with what ever is at hand when there is a space. Such as when sand is dug on beach, more sand will fall, or uproot a plant and another will grow. Whatever is at hand is the thing that will fill the space… so this is why I want to really express that be steadfast about all the things that you want to bring into your life when you are in this space, because the thoughts that you surround yourself with are the ones that will rush in and fill that space…

I am grateful… I Am