Fallow times of great growth has Spring pushing in me. The cold with the springs promise - between places. I love shifting spaces, it reminds me of my own internal landscape that has the winds blowing through and altering the dunes of my being.
To live with the seasons being able to flow into and around me has been one of the greatest gifts that I have ever given myself. I cannot even imagine that I was owned by a large corporation 3 years ago. I felt boxed, limited, controlled, and was so often in “trouble” because I refused to be a sheeple.
The past week I have been so thrilled by the storms hitting the Cape. I dared to go down to the beach when I knew that rain was sweeping across the ocean. I’ve learned to read the speed at which wild rains approach (always quicker than you think!) but still I dared. I dared to feel the biting cold because the Ocean called me. I stood before her magnificence, closed my eyes… her booming voice of a thousand memories reverberated through my heart. I opened my eyes, and the salt from me dripped onto the beach. It was tempting to lie on the wet sand and just let the storm come and wash over me. Cold and wet did not have its appeal that day though. I turned and did not look back or rather across my porch till I reached home… just in time.
I read something this week that really stirred me. It was all about risk, we are here to do this in increments or large forms… I would like to share what I read. It lives in me:
"Life will break you. Nobody can protect you from that, and living alone won't either, for solitude will also break you with its yearning. You have to love. You have to feel. It is the reason you are here on earth. You are here to risk your heart. You are here to be swallowed up. And when it happens that you are broken, or betrayed, or left, or hurt, or death brushes near, let yourself sit by an apple tree and listen to the apples falling all around you in heaps, wasting their sweetness. Tell yourself you tasted as many as you could." Louise Erdrich from The Painted Drum.
Dare, face any storm you wish, and feel the between spaces in your hearts limbs…